K: I wake up! I did poopie in my diaper.
Me: (exasperated) we do poopie on the potty, K. We only use diapers for nappy. Can you do poopie on the potty please?
K: Never. (laughs a surprisingly maniacal laugh for a three-year-old)
We go to the changing table, I clean her up.
me: where are your pants?
K: NO PANTS. NO PANTS (she wiggles like a fish out of water) NO PANTS NO PANTS
me: Well, we’re not putting a diaper on. You’re a big girl, you go on the potty.
K: NO PANTS NO PANTS NO PANTS
me: okay. No pants. (pick your battles, right?)
It seems we’ll be wearing a shirt this evening.
I let her off the table. She goes immediately to her dress up box, and soon she is dolled up in pink fairy wings, plastic necklaces, plastic bracelets, sunglasses, heels and a giant pink feathered hat, bare-ass naked from the waist down.